Enneagram Complexities: Subsets

Each Enneagram Temperament has three possibilities that complement their Type. I believe these are developed in childhood based on the family/childhood environment and are not present at birth. In my family, with all types present, we are all social subsets.

The Subsets are important to understand, particularly for therapists. A subset from childhood can change the tone of a temperament. A self-preservation Enneagram 2, for instance, will be focused on others but particularly concerned with their safety and security. A social Enneagram 2 will focus on the needs of groups of people, not just a partner or family member. A 1 to 1 Enneagram 2 will focus on the needs of a partner, son, or daughter.

1 to 1:

The 1-to-1 Subsets are interested in having only one or two relationships. They are very glued to their partners and probably to one parent. When a 1 to 1 Subset is married to a Social Subset, they need to make a lot of accommodations. We see this in couples therapy, where one person likes to party, the other does not. I often suggest that they takes two cars to a party, so the 1 to 1 partner can leave earlier than the social partner.

Social:

The Social Subset of each Enneagram Type enjoys the company of others and socializes well within their Temperament parameters. The Social 5, for instance, can be very social and comfortable for a certain amount of time with people they know. Then, they need to be alone to rejuvenate. Most other social Enneagram styles will be able to socialize longer than a 5 and not be depleted.

Self-Preservation:

This Subset is interested in safety and security, much like a 6, but with a Temperament overlay. A Self-Preservation 2, for instance, will worry about caring for loved ones and keeping them safe but not about their own safety. A self-preservation 7 will have fun while paying attention to safety and security. A self-preservation 1 will notice more details about safety and security than a social Enneagram 1.